You crawl into the depths of the cave.

It's cold and damp, and as you go deeper inside the glowing lights become brighter...you reach the end of your descent and are faced with a large cavern, filled with dancing orbs of blue and purple, and a polar bear inside, doomscrolling on his tumblr.

Erm...how did you...oh nvm you're the one from the stream ok chill. Uh...well I guess I'll..

My name is diasma...aka SAM! I sometimes go by Bram too...but that name is based off some cringe stuff and when I actually transition I probably won't use it...might not even use the name Sam...ANYWAYYYY

I, Sam, the creator of this dinky little thing we call a website, am happy to have you here! I am a full-time student, full-time autistic transgender fagfreak, and a part-time horse! (I spend the other chunk of time being a polar bear...) As of March of this year, I also discovered that I am asexual!
I've been on this website for a few months, just lurking, but I was too scared to create something because it all looked VERY complicated (and it still is, im using sadgrl's layout for this site haha..but doing pretty okay at figuring out a lot of stuff on my own!) I finally came back here when I deleted my instagram profile (fuck zuck) and decided that social media just is not the vibe!!!(But alas! I am a fraud. Every so often I redownload tiktok and I still use tumblr for the 20 people I follow. Is that a crime?!?!?!?!)

- Overview of my Interests -

My interests go all over the place from polar exploration to an obsession with traditional Persian music and everything in between!
My current fixations include but are not limited to The Hobbit (Jackson Movies no I'm not sorry), BBC Robin Hood, AMC's The Terror, The Witcher (books and games), Horses, Polar Bears, Inuit Mythology, Ecology, and any and all forms of MUSIC!!!!
Seriously. Let's talk music. I will listen to anything. I mean it!

- My dark and twisted mind...heh -

This is where I talk about my personality I guess. As mentioned before, I am autistic! I was very suspicious a few years ago, but for a few months I've been like 100% sure that I am...and if not then I guess neurotypicals are way weirder than we all think. This determination was done after surveying my friends and taking so many assessments and doing a borderline obsessive level of comparison of different experiences...yeah.
I am also a big fan of enneagram, and use it religiously. My friend James got really into it and I did too...and I am a sp/so 5w4! I had typed myself as a 3 when I first learned about the system, but I was in a weird place which definitely skewed my perception of myself. In terms of MBTI, I believe I am an INTP, so for the functions, TiNe. The functions are much better than the "here's your type and what job you should have lol" schmuck that everyone talks about. I find both of these to be really good self help tools, especially enneagram, for it has helped me truly understand myself at times where I thought it was impossible! ^-^

I will also use this section to talk about my orientations...I am a transgender guy, I've known for ages, and now that I'm in college I've really been able to express myself in that way. (One of my professors last semester said "Hey, man!" to me, and I almost stopped in my tracks.) I suppose I could call myself gay, as I've only felt "attracted" to men...but I don't know if I've felt attracted to anyone at all. I am a sex-repuled asexual, aka part of the celibacy club. Never shall I gaze upon someone's nether regions, nor shall they gaze upon mine, and I am relieved that I discovered that about myself. I'm not entirely sure if I'm aromantic, or if dating in college while being what I am just seems like SUCH a headache that I'd rather jump into an active volcano.

- Play that funky Music, white boy! -

Music...where do I even start? I love it so much that it has its own subsection, and I'll probably end up making my own page for my music taste at some point...
My top genres of '25 so far are...Polish Folk, New Wave, Indie Folk, Instrumental, and Soft Rock. My favorite bands/artists of '25 are Kapela ze wsi Warsawa/Warsaw Village Band, America, Jocelyn Pook, Sume, and Sea Power!
I think music is my favorite artistic medium, while all mediums of course have feeling and soul I believe that I best understand artwork when I can hear it, when I can feel the reverberations of the bass and beat in my soul, and become overwhelmed by the melody. Last Christmas I received a pair of Sennheiser Momentum 4's, and they are my favorite device by far as I now get audio that is SO CLEAR. God I love music. Yknow the thing that happens when parts of the song bounce between each ear? Makes me nut. Metaphorically.